Coming Out of the Dark

As astutely pointed out by my partner in sexual chocolate, aka my life partner, two very important bloggers should be very apprehensively happy about their respective basketball teams making it to the finals. Go Lakers/Pistons (I put Lakers first to be alphabetically sound, not because of any sort of phantom favoritism)!

In NYC this weekend I saw P. Diddy and Estella Warren*. Which was strange because I had just viewed The Cooler. She had two giant Marc Jacobs and Helmut Lang bags slung over her shoulder. I almost didn't see her because my friend and I were too busy rolling around in the park laughing at some guy in a spiked helmet and cape sneak up behind strangers and ask them about the weather, all while his friends filmed him.

P. Diddy had a diminutive white dog stuffed into a Louis Vuitton dog carrier. He pulled it out ever so gently and showed it to the mound of honeys (every single girl was flawless, those bitches) that were waiting for him outside of the restaurant he was going to. He had been driven in a baby blue Ferrari. No, really.

Has anyone ever been to the Magnolia Bakery? Holy pappies, those cupcakes made me want to do the worm all the way through the west village in happiness. Pink frosting should be mandatory consumption each and every day.

The cab driver that took me to the airport had a bum leg and knew a lot about movies. By the end he had made the decision that I should be a movie critic. I agree wholeheartedly, especially since all I have to do is give The New Yorker a ring. My novel can kiss my ass, I know once Anthony Lane hears my critique on Vivica A. Fox's body of work he'll hang up his hat and I'll be hired immediatement.

Julia Roberts is pregnant with twinsies. Eh.

I think I'm going to use self-tanner this summer. I've decided there ain't no shame in that game.

I'm going to Chicago this weekend to visit SAIC. Suggestions are needed. Thanks to everyone who didn't post anything about NYC, it truly didn't help at all. Not commenting is the new commenting.

Lastly, word to your mother.

*I just realized that it may seem like I saw the Diddy and E. War together, when in fact their sightings were on two separate days.