Thursday, April 22, 2004

London, Slough, and The Inevitable Bush Comment

Unhappiness is the sudden alarm of contentment.

That is a very English thing for me to say, which is fitting, as I have just made my triumphant return from what the Brits call "London." It was a good trip, topped off by making out en flagrante with Ricky Gervais after his BAFTA crowning. I also sent Posh a naughty 'txt,' so she wouldn't feel left out. The transcript is as follows:

"Ginger Spice was always my favourite."

I didn't get a reply. It was much like the time I tried to leave Paris Hilton a message only to find that her box was full.

Speaking of the tanned and scary, Jeff Goldblum's blum was caught dangerously close to a bobbing buoy which just happened to be Lisa Marie's head. While I think it is a dastardly thing to do to photograph innocent b-list celebs (we'll call them b-lebs) on a private beach as they frolick and lick, one can't be blamed for looking and linking. (Thanks, Whatevs)

The California grand jury has indicted Michael Jackson, yet his attorney says he's not guilty. O, what a tangled web we weave, when we wear Revlon and do Chenée Turns on tops of cars. Come on, California! Lighten up, man.

Today is Earth Day, and what better representative of the hope for the betterment of our planet than President Bush? After all, he did approve drilling in the Arctic Refuge, an important factor in the current administration's quest to kill us all.

One of my traveling companions labeled Tony Blair a 'puppet' to the Bush administration, but since I'm British now, I'd say he's more of a 'poppet.'

"When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life." Samuel Johnson, you were right on the money. 'Tis the center of the world. I read today in the Wall Street Journal that designers are turning to Londoners for fashion tips. Speaking of fashion, I went to Harrod's and bought my dog expensive crap, but I also viewed the Dodi/Diana shrine. In other Lady Di news, her fam is none too pleased with CBS. Join the club, and by club I mean the FCC.

One last quote to end this entry, but also to assuage any fears of my reader(s): "We will not waver."

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